10 Lessons Khloe and Lamar Odom Teach Us about Marriage

I confess…I’m an addict. I’m addicted to reality television. I watch some of the pathetic women trying/wishing to be wives “wife” shows like, The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Basketball Wives and Mob Wives. I don’t know why, but I find them all pretty entertaining. Maybe it’s because the stuff going on in their lives is so far (in a good way) from anything my life will every be. *Thank you God* Of all the shows that feature a wife or husband in a reality TV setting my favorite has to be “Khloe and Lamar.” If you haven’t heard of it, it features entrepreneur Khloe Kardashian Odom and her husband, Los Angeles Lakers basketball star, Lamar Odom. I have to say, I love, love, love the Odoms as a married couple and I’ve been watching their show religiously this season. Now, I know that a lot of people don’t believe their marriage is real because they tied the knot so quickly and sadly a lot of people are looking for their marriage to fail, but I say…if they are faking this thing, they’ve got me completely fooled.

To me they appear to be a regular married couple who are just as normal as any other married couple. What I really like about them is that while they have their ups and downs dealing with and adjusting to married life they always handle their issues in a very loving and respectful manner. I haven’t been keeping up with the ratings for this show, but I imagine that they can’t be that great. My rationale is that while this couple does have some issues that might cause a bit of interest, the issues aren’t overly drama filled. Most of their issues aren’t even issues with one another (another thing I think America was hoping to see), but mostly issues involving things/people they have to deal with in life. The Odoms handle their problems openly, calmly and honestly, the way a lot of married couples should handle their problems. It is my feeling that this is what makes them abnormal in terms of your average American reality TV couple. They’re abnormal because they clearly have a set of strong communication skills and are committed to making their marriage a priority. This is not something we are used to seeing from a married couple on reality television. I don’t think America really appreciates the positivity this couple has to offer. No matter how you feel about Khloe, Lamar or their marriage, we can all learn something very important about seeing this couple functioning in a committed marriage with an emphasis on friendship.

I personally think the Odoms have a great marriage and they we can teach us a lot about having a healthy happy marriage. I mean, obviously Khloe and Lamar appear to be a couple to which many can relate so, you never know, maybe seeing how this couple interacts, for all practical purposes, may be a key to reducing the divorce rate in our country. Hear me out! Celebrities can have major influence over the way we think, act and aspire to live. While I’m not saying that they are the world’s most perfect couple, I do believe that in only 1 season of their show, they have taught many couples a great deal about having a great marriage. If you were paying attention, here’s a recap of what you should have learned this season:

1. Protect your marriage. Even if your marriage is not as high profile as Khloe and Lamar’s, you ought to treat it like it is. One thing I respect about Khloe as a woman and a wife is that she doesn’t allow her home to be made into a party palace. She treats her home and marriage as things of value that need protection. She realizes that there are women in the world who don’t mind trying to steal a husband away from his wife. She lets it be known that she is very committed to her marriage and is not willing to let anything or anyone come between it.

2. Keep the drama low. I’ve heard Khloe say several times that she doesn’t want to bother her husband with certain issues and that she only wants him to focus on his basketball career. I think that while everything she decides to keep from him is not necessarily something she should keep from him (like pregnancy issues), I like the fact that she is doing her best to make their home and marriage a very calm and relaxing environment for the both of them.

3. Pick your battles. On one episode, Khloe and Lamar were designing a fragrance and they came to several disagreements about the scent as well as the packaging. Unfortunately, Khloe felt very unappreciated for the work she had put into the project, which lead to a small blow up between she and Lamar. She was very concerned that their disagreement over the project would impact their working relationship and ultimately their marriage. Khloe decided that the health of her marriage was more important than the project and while in the end the project was successful, I loved how she was unwilling to allow their disagreements over business to take over the marriage. She definitely knows how to put her marriage first.

4. Always have your spouse’s back. It appears that Khloe is incredibly involved in the couples finances and when she senses there is something that could negatively impact Lamar’s future or his finances, she is all over it. She demonstrated this when she had to call out Lamar’s best friend Jamie over some discrepancies regarding the clothing line the friends operate together. Mrs. Odom’s loyalty and interests clearly lie with her husband and she’s not afraid to let you know it.

5. Know when to let hubby wear the pants. Khloe grew up with and had a great relationship with her father. Like any wife who has experienced this type of relationship, she wants the same for her husband. However, Lamar expressly warned Khloe not to get involved when it came to his relationship with his dad. Unfortunately, Khloe didn’t listen and had to learn the hard way that she’d overstepped her boundaries with her husband. I think she learned a valuable lesson that sometimes a wife needs to know when to let her husband take the lead.

6. Learn to be tender with your wife. This season Khloe experiences some body image issues. She thought and was even told she was too heavy which really upset her. What I liked most about her experience in dealing with this was how her husband demonstrated tenderness and sensitivity about the issue. Lamar can often be seen gazing lovingly into his wife’s eyes and telling her she’s beautiful. I think every man should learn from Lamar that a woman needs a man who is willing to be tenderhearted. What I admire most about him is that while he can be tender and sensitive to his wife’s body image issues, he understands that while he can tell her she’s beautiful all day, she has to come to a place of security about her own body. Way to go Lamar! You get like 100 cool point for that!

7. Put your wife first. Lamar’s former BFF Jaime and Khloe had some disagreements regarding the operation of Lamar’s clothing line Rich Soil. Jaime disrespectfully tried to tell Khloe to stay out of their business affairs to which Khloe responded by pulling the wife card. Good move! Lamar was placed in a position to play mediator between his wife and best friend, but ultimately had to side with his wife because it was important to Lamar for Khloe to view him in a respectable manner. It may not be easy men, but when you get married, your wife becomes your best friend so you’d better get used to putting her first.

8. Make sex a priority. We all know the Odoms are trying to conceive so they are probably doing it like rabbits, but one could easily get the impression that they make a healthy sexual relationship a priority for their marriage. I think its painfully obvious even in other Kardashian-related shows that Khloe makes a serious effort to have frequent and interesting sex with her husband. She’s gone as far as making sexy videos, purchasing sexy lingerie and even allowing her sister to give her a wax all for the sake of pleasing her husband (and possibly for comedic relief). While I’m not sure all of this actually belongs on TV (but definitely makes the show more interesting) I can definitely admire her efforts.

9. Enjoy one another. When Khloe and Lamar are together it appears they genuinely enjoy spending time together. Whether they are going out for dinner, hanging out by the pool or sitting around watching TV they seem like their quality time together is well spent. They teach us that happily married couples like spending time with one another. Go figure!

10. Cook something (be a helper to your husband)! While I don’t think cooking is necessarily a requirement for a happy marriage, I think it demonstrates that Khloe doesn’t mind being a helper to her husband. Lamar asks Khloe to prepare a meal for he and his father. Khloe willingly obliges. I’m sure it doesn’t hurt that he compliments her cooking, but I think its admirable that she’s willing to step up and help her husband out when he asks. I get the feeling her desire to be a helper to her husband reaches much further than just cooking meals.

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8 Responses to 10 Lessons Khloe and Lamar Odom Teach Us about Marriage

  1. alovelydai says:

    You know what? I appreciate this perspective. I watched the first few episodes and I felt like Khloe was doing her best Stepford Wife impersonation. It just didn't feel authentic to me but I realized a few episodes later (and reconfirmed with this post) that their union felt weird because it's rare on TV. I do think they have a real marriage with great lessons.

    Great post.
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  2. Miranda says:

    I have only seen a couple of episodes, but I agree that what they have is real. Mostly because they are so low key and drama free with each other. I don't think they would be faking it to be low key. Drama brings ratings and if there was a whole lot of drama going on, I would think they were in it for the publicity. I have to admit that I did not like the portrayal of their relationship when they were on Keeping up w/ the K's – mostly due to the baby talk that Khloe became famous for – the whole thing just seemed staged and too perfect. But I am glad they did this show because it shows that they are a real couple who care about each other.
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  3. nylse says:

    ummm …i dunno, not a big reality tv fan…but if they're teaching those lessons then i say – great!!!

  4. beloved says:

    @ Joycelyn: I do not know how old you are but you are very astute. As a older female I recalled discussing the fact that Khloe's and Lamar and 's relationship seemed so much like the real deal. Beside, being a female I am a Believer /Christian and their relationship model what is required of/from a union in the site of God. The 10 steps you laid out demonstrated the teachings from the Bible. 1. Genesis 2:24 Says that at marriage that a wife becomes the most important person to a man, they are now one/ a unit that superceeds his family. 2. Proverbs 31:10-31 Then illustrates the character of a Good Wife – a woman is to have her husband's back and protect her home. – I do not know the Odoms, or their spiritual state, only from what I see of and/or read about them. However, I know that the Word of God is true and if you practice the Word – IT WILL WORK FOR YOU!__It seems to be working real well for them. I wish them nothing but God's continued blessing on thier marriage and family.

    • The Student says:

      I'm 29. I surely hope these are the things they both believe. I do however really appreciate the fact that they're marriage reflects a positive representation of what marriage can be. I truly believe that marriage is what you make it!

  5. Valencia says:

    I really enjoyed there show also. I thought she was doing a great job as a wife, cooking, etc. I enjoyed the no drama also. I would watch another season.
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  6. webly says:

    I'm not a fan of reality TV but I love the reminders on your list. There are some battles I just agree to lose in my marriage like deciding on electronics and decorating the house. I really don't let certain things bother me anymore because it's not that important.
    Sex….. hmmmm I think every busy mom struggles with that. When you spend the day dealing with over active toddlers, I don't see how I'm going to look sexy for anything because I am knocked out on the couch.

    Great tips
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  7. I love this. Great Post…Most people do not like the Kardashians but I really do. Not so sure about the how I feel about Khloe and Lamar yet but I hope that it is a relationship and not just for the cameras. I am not married but I fee like these the things that should happen in a marriage.
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